A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father: “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?”
The father, surprised, answers. “Well, son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman’s breasts are like melons, round, and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, but hanging a bit. After 50, they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes. You see them and they make you cry.”
This infuriated his wife and daughter. The daughter asks, “Mom, how many different kinds of willies are there?” The mother smiles and says, “Well, dear, a man goes through three phases also. In his 20s, his willy is like an oak tree - mighty and hard. In his 30s and 40s, it’s like a birch, flexible but reliable. After his 50s, it’s like a Christmas tree.” “A Christmas tree?” the daughter asks.
“Yes, dead from the root up, and the balls are just for decoration.”
Scroll below for more funny jokes!
This Joke Begins with a Freshly Made Bed.....
When this boy leaves a not for his father, it's nearly enough to give him a heart attack...
Husbands Have Their Own Sense of Humor...
Check out these 12 examples of husbands and boyfriends being absolutely hilarious.
Hilarious: The Pharmacist is NOT Impressed
After Dad visits the pharmacy and gets some treats for his young son, his boy's actions take an interesting turn on a return trip to the drug store...
Joke: The Truth About Politics
A little boy goes to his dad and asks, "What is politics?" The father says, "Well son...
Our Moms and Dads Can Make Us Laugh So Hard!
There's no doubting that moms and dads are different, and these hilarious pictures definitely back up that notion. Here are 15 differences between Mom and Dad.
Hilarious: Don't Ask Me What That Is Please, Son
When a young boy keeps asking about the thing that's dangling underneath the elephant, things get
These Have to Be the Most Oddly Specific Signs Ever Made
Laugh out loud at these hilariously specific signs that will leave you wondering who exactly they were made for.
What On Earth Were People Thinking When They Did This???
People can get things horribly wrong even when they only have one job. These 27 "you had one job" fails are utterly hilarious.
Hilarious: These "translators" Should Quit Their Job...
This is hilarious!! See These Signs in ENGLISH!!
Hilarious: When Timing and Comedy Team Up!
Comedy is all about timing and these photos are the perfect example for it!
To Date this Hilarious Father's Daughter, Here are the Rules
While dads may be glad to see their daughter in love, when it comes to fathers and daughters, there are some hard line rules that NO suitor should cross!
These Rude 'Chinese' Proverbs Got Me Laughing
Ok, so they may not really be Chinese, but they are certainly funny!
The Most Outrageously Hilarious Signs You’ll See
You know what time it is? It’s time for some funny signs!
This Prank is Something Quite Magical!
A levitating woman is rudely interrupted by a kid... hilarious!
Pets That Never Fail to Make Us Laugh & Brighten Our Day
Pets always have a way of making us laugh. Take a look at this hilarious clip that will surely brighten your day.
When Birds Misbehave, the Results Are Utterly Hilarious!
If you think that only dogs and cats are capable of being total jerks, then you ain't seen nothing yet!
Hilarious: If You Love English You'll Love These Puns!
We’ve collected 14 side-splitting jokes and puns that highlight common grammatical mistakes, contain clever twists on words, and more!
These Funny Restaurant Signs Will Have You Guffawing
The iconic Tex-Mex restaurant, El Arroyo is back with some more hilariously clever signs.
Hilarious: Some of the Funniest Shop Names I've Seen!
These restaurants are worth visiting just for their hilarious names!
These Dogs Just Don't Understand the Concept of Size!
Maybe a cat took their bed, maybe they just miss being small, but one thing is for sure - these dogs need a bigger bed!
These Amusing Animals Clearly Think They're People
If you thought our unique human traits set us apart from animals think again, because these pets clearly think they're human!
These Guys Have Some WEIRD Choices in Christmas Sweaters!
Some people just have bizarre tastes when it comes to Christmas sweaters.
Classic Comedy: Mr Bean Is the Ultimate Hopeless Romantic
I always considered myself a hopeless romantic, that is until I saw how Mr. Bean's big date went.
The Lighter Side of Love: 18 Funny Valentine’s Day Quotes
Love is a serious matter, but it’s good to have some humor about it sometimes.
Parrots Are So Funny: A Hilarious Compilation!
This video compilation is all about funny parrots and how they make you laugh.
Hilarious: 15 Misspelled Signs That'll Make You Laugh!
We collected 15 hysterical signs with spelling mistakes here, so brace yourselves - because it’s about to get funny!
Here's Proof That Wrong Spacing Can Ruin Any Sign...
Sometimes, a tiny mistake like a space in the wrong place can make all the difference, turning an ordinary sign into the most hilarious one you've ever seen!
Classic Comedy: It's Not Easy Being a Conductor!
This hilarious and musical comedy sketch will leave you both delighted and laughing!
Hilarious: When It's Just Not Your Day...
These photos show spectacularly awful things that can happen to anyone. Let’s hope there was someone to give them a big hug afterwards.
Funnies: The Differences Between Men and Women
These images will show you clearly why they say that women are from Venus and men are from Mars. Take a look at these amusing images for a good laugh.
When Two Old Ladies Sit Down and Make Us Laugh!
Hilarious and classic sketch from the Mrs. Brown classic show.
Hilarious! The Joys of Motherhood - As Animals See Them
Motherhood may sound like a good idea, but it really takes it out of you, as these dog and cat mothers can hilariously testify.
Read Pensioner's Priceless Response After Rejected by Army
A pensioner tries to join the army but gets rejected. He believes that pensioners make better soldiers than 18-year-olds, and his reasons will crack you up!
WATCH: 10 Funny Xmas Editions of 'Simon's Cat' All in One!
These hilarious cartoons from Simon's cat serve to remind us not to forget something really important: It's Christmas for our cats too!
When Cats Attack, Absolutely Nothing is Safe!
These Photos are filled with cats going into attack mode and assaulting everything from their devoted owners to innocent cardboard boxes, blankets, and shoes.
This Man Pushed a Button. He Had No Idea What It Will Do...
This man saw a button at the town square, he didn't realize what would happen when he pushed it.
Hilarious: We All Have That One Friend Who's Kinda Silly...
In every group of friends, we have this one friend who just keeps messing up. If your group doesn't have one, then it's probably you...
These Adorably Cute & Funny Comic Strips Are So Relatable!
Fowl Language Comics was created by Brian Gordon, who says he draws much inspiration from his struggles as a parent. Take a look at his hilarious illustrations!
Have You Ever Read a Sign Or Notice and Thought... WHAT!?
Sometimes you see a sign or notice and you just have to do a double take. These 18 utterly hilarious spelling fails will have you laughing all day long!
Never Thought Bathroom Signs Could Be So Funny! (Rude)
These hilarious bathrooms signs are sure to make your trip to the little boy's or girl's room much more enjoyable!
Classic Comedy: How NOT to Pick Up Women
This Carol Burnett classic comedy sketch is all about picking up women, but this guy doesn't have a clue.
Why On Earth Would Anyone Think This is a Good Idea...
People will always try to find a quick fix or a cheap solution to a problem, and these photos show this in earnest. Have a laugh at these ridiculous botch jobs.
Mr. Bean: How Should One NOT Paint?
Our old friend Mr. Bean is the only one who can get into such a situation when all he needs to do is paint...