Corona crisis reaches new level:
Iran out of toilet paper.
I really hope corona virus can't spread through s*x
It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
With Corona Virus spreading, I never thought our deaths will also be..
“Made in China”
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
What did the Indian boy say to his parent before going into self isolation?
Mumbai.
While it’s taking a while for the Corona virus to reach other countries, China got it right off the bat.
Definition of Irony - When the Year Of The Rat starts with a plague.
My daughter told me COVID stinks and she misses her teacher...
I told her "I Ms. your teacher too."
You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days?
It's the mask era.
A man walks into a bar and goes up to the bartender and says "I'll have a Corona please, hold the virus."
Why did Princess Leia contract coronavirus?
Because she went to woo Han.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
What do you get when a raven flies into a group of 18 crows?
Corvid-19.
What movie perfectly describes the corona virus?
No country for old men.
I tried to come up with a joke about social distancing but this is as close as I could get.
Corona virus has caused our local supermarket to sell out of pasta.
All because of a fusilli people.
Tom Hanks just got the Corona virus.
They had to lock the whole Cast Away.
Please stop with all the corona jokes.
I‘m sick of it.
I got my COVID-19 vaccine from a "doctor" who approached me in a downtown alley after midnight, offering it for $50 cash.
It was a shot in the dark, but I took it.
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
My mom always told me I wouldn't accomplish anything by lying in bed all day.
But look at me now, I'm saving the world.
Just saw a burglar kicking his own door in.
I asked: “What are you doing?”
“Working from home.”
Turns out my dad who’s a locksmith still has to go to work during lockdown.
He’s a key worker, you see.
I wanna bob for your apples.
Is that a magic wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
Coughy.
Me, to my wife: They said that the Covid vaccines are safe and has no side effects.
My wife: Who did?
Me: Yep.
I may be dressed as a vampire tonihgt, but if you play your cards right you might be the one sucking
You should dress up as a baker for Halloween with that set of buns.
John Travolta has been diagnosed with the Corona Virus.
He had chills that were multiplying.
Is it true what they say about the size of a man’s canine teeth?
Corona Beer sales falter amid Corona virus crisis...
Guess their viral marketing strategy failed.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
With all this spare time on their hands people are going to start pursuing their passions. I wouldn't be surprised to sudden explosion in the arts, a renewal in scientific interest, and a mass proliferation of original content.
A coronaissance, if you will.
People with a cold - "I just want to stay in bed and do nothing, I feel terrible."
People with Corona Virus - "I feel terrible, I think I will go skiing in Austria, visit the Eiffel Tower and maybe do some white water rafting in Camino de Santiago."
I should have dressed up as a ghost tonight so I could let you under my sheets.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
Since i have COVID people tell me i enjoy bad music and movies
Guess i have become tasteless.
Nice pumpkins!
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
Why did the Chinese communist party try to cover up the outbreak of the corona virus disease?
They were afraid not everyone could get it.
Listen to them, children of the night. Let’s give them some competition.
I broke up with my girlfriend after she contracted the corona virus
I’ve decided to wash my hands of her.
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
What's the difference between Wuhan and Las Vegas?
What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.