Keyboard Puns

There's no ESCape from these Keyboard puns.

Keyboard Puns

My wireless keyboard isn't working
I guess I need to re-pair it.
Why is the 7 key on the keyboard so afraid?
Because the & is near
Did you hear about the guy who got fired from the Keyboard Factory?
He didn't put enough shifts in.
I'm not like other keyboards...
I'm qwerty
Why are boy keyboards scared of girl keyboards?
They don't want to get qwerties.
My keyboard fell apart today.
I feel like I'm losing Ctrl of everything.
I want anarchy
Because my keyboard is missing one.
I'm really obsessed with the F1 key on my keyboard. I'm trying to get help.
I wasn't making enough money as a keyboard percussionist so I started moonlighting as gun salesperson.
I go from glockenspiel to Glock and spiel.
What type of blood does a keyboard have?
Typo.
Which keyboard shortcut doesn't work if you're incontinent?
Ctrl-P
If you used a keyboard with built-in speakers, you would be...?
Stereotyping.
I was dating a keyboard but we had to break up...
...she just wasn't my type.
I came into the office early and switched as many M and N keys on keyboards as I could. Some might say I'm a monster...
But others will say nomster
I always love pressing F5 on my keyboard.
It's so refreshing.
I left my laptop outside on the picnic table, and when I came back, the keyboard was covered in ants...
...It took a while to herd them together but I finally got them all under control.
My keyboard is missing a key. I lost ctrl.
IF YOU GUYS SEE A LINK ON FACEBOOK THAT SAYS "GET A MILLION DOLLARS FOR FREE" DON'T CLICK ON IT.
IT IS A VIRUS THAT PUTS YOUR PHONE'S KEYBOARD ON CAPS LOCK.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
I introduced my mouse to my keyboard today...
It was awkward at first, but then they just clicked.
Got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. I couldn't keep the space clean.
Today my "O" button on my keyboard stopped working.
Maybe it was a sign I should've stopped o-ppressing the keyboard.
I heard that starting next year, keyboards will no longer be sold with italics...
But it was a bold-faced lie.
I left my job at the keyboard factory today. To be honest, I had been looking for an Escape for a while.
My wife told me she'll slam my head on the keyboard if I don't get off the computer.
I'm not too worried, I think she's jokinlkjhfakljn m,.nbziyoao78yv87dfaoyuofaytdf.
A good workman doesn't blame his fools
\*tools.
Stupid keyboard.
Just can't get away from my broken keyboard. There's no escape.
What do you do if you spill maple syrup all over your keyboard?
Just turn off sticky keys.
I asked the librarian for the new book on erectile dysfunction.
She typed on her keyboard and said "It's not coming up!"
I said "Yeah, that's the one!!"
V
V

Edit*: sorry it seems as the CTRL button on my keyboard isn't working
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
Did you hear about the keyboard that lost it's Period Key?
He was missing the point.
How many wipes does it take to clean a keyboard?
qwsedrftgyhujikolpawesdrtfgyhujikloaszxdcrfvgtbhnjmk,lazsxdcfvgsedtfrgyftg67y78u87u8uii9op[;'';;'/;l/l;.l.k,lkmjkmertyudfghjk12q21q2qw3qwe3we4r45rt6ygerdgfvbwedfcv qwedfscv
On a keyboard, nothing is under control.
What do you call a solar powered keyboard?
A photosynthesiser
Dear keyboard manufacturers, I'm writing to request a redesign so that g and t wouldn't be right next to each other. Retards
Where do the keys on a keyboard go to have a good time
The spacebar.
What's one of the worst things you could come across while surfing the web?
Your keyboard.
I took all the punctuation marks off of the judge's keyboard.
I expect a long sentence.
I for one
is something you might do if you had a broken keyboard
I've got no home, I haven't got control, and I can't see any escape.
I should get a new keyboard.
What key on the keyboard is truly out of this world?
The spacebar.
I went into a bar with a keyboard under my arm. The barman said "Oi! We don"t want your typing in here".
Keep Your Friends Close, Your Utility Keys Closer.
Playing the keyboard is...
my type of music.
Why did the keyboard not get any sleep?...
Because it has two shifts.
I just lost a key on my keyboard
Now its all out of control.
Why did Karen press Ctrl-Shift-Esc on her keyboard?
Because she wanted to speak to the Task Manager!
What do you call a gushing keyboard?
sqwerty
What's the sketchiest button combo on a computer keyboard?
Shift + T