It’s raining cats and dogs outside.
I think I just stepped in a poodle.
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
Knock Knock?
Who's there?
Hurricane
Hurricane who?
Hurry! Cane you jog away from the storm?
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
What did the evaporating raindrop say?
I’m going to pieces.
The only way bees can fly right through the rain is when they have their yellow jackets on.
How could the skeleton tell that rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
What was one raindrop overheard saying to another? Two's company, three's a cloud.
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
Why are people in big cities in Spain always dry?
Because the rain in Spain falls mainly on the plain.
What do you call a month’s worth of rain?
England.
It started raining coins outside today.
I guess it’s just climate change.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
What does Santa often say to Mrs Claus? Come and look at the rain-dear.
What’s worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
What falls all the time and never gets hurt? Rain.
Why do sailors eat shellfish when rain is forecast?
It’s the clam before the storm.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Butter
Butter who?
Butter get an umbrella, it looks like it's going to rain!
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
Why didn’t the light rain hit the target?
It just mist.
When does soil get rich?
When mother nature makes it rain.
What's all wet and likes to shake? It's an earthquake on a rainy day.
Why do cows lie on each other in the rain?
To keep each udder dry.
When the storm begun, the garden party became a bit disorganized and food service was turned to a frost come frost served.
What’s the difference between a horse and wet weather?
One reigns up and the other rains down.
What do you get if you come fourth in the National Weatherman Awards? A precipitation trophy.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
What do you call a bear that’s stuck out in the rain?
A drizzly bear.
When it was raining yesterday, I saw a man use ketchup and I got quite shocked. It is only later that I learnt he was taking advantage of the raining cats and hot dogs.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.
Two fish were swimming in a stream when it began to rain.
One fish said, “Quick, let’s swim under that bridge, otherwise we will get wet!”
A little boy asks his dad, “Why is it raining? Is the sky sad?”
The dad replies, “Yes, son, the sky is pretty blue.”
What do you call a camper driving through frozen rain?
Van Hailin’.
The queen’s favorite form of precipitation is the reign.
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
When is Monday coming?
MonSoon!
What happened when it started raining coins?
It knocked some sense (cents) into the world.
I'm saving for a rainy day, so far I've collected a couple of raincoats, an anorak, and a dinghy.
Ensure you save for the rainy day because even your closest friends can give you a cold shoulder.
What type of pants do rain clouds wear? Thunderwear.
When it rains chickens and ducks, the best description for the weather is foul weather.
What does a spy do in the rain?
He goes undercover.
When we were young, we had this myth that lightning bolts go all the way to cloud 9.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.