What swims in the sea, carries a machine gun, and makes you an offer you can't refuse? The Codfather
Where do fish sleep? In a river bed
Where does a fisherman go to get his hair cut?
The fisherman goes to a bobber shop!
What does the pope eat during lent? Holy mackerel!
Why are fish so smart Because they swim in schools!
Which fish can perform operations? A Sturgeon!
What do fish and women have in common? They both stop shaking their tale after you catch them!
What did the magician say to the fisherman?
"Pick a cod, any cod."
Why did the fish cross the road? Cause it was hooked!
Where do football players go shopping in the offseason? The tackle shop.
Why are fisherman so stingy?
Their jobs make them sel-fish!
What is the difference between a catfish and a lawyer? One is a bottom-dwelling, scum-sucking scavenger and the other is a fish!
Where does a fish keep his money In the River Bank!
What is the fastest fish in the water? A motopike
What is the difference between a fish and a piano? You can't tuna fish.
If fish lived on land, in which country would they live? Finland.
What did the fish say when it hit a concrete wall "Dam!"
What did the fisherman say to the card magician? Take a cod, any cod.
What do you call a Sith Lord who likes to go fishing? Darth Wader.
What do you call a fish whith a car? A carfish!
How do you communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!
Why did the vegan go deep-sea fishing? Just for the halibut!
What do you call a small fish magician? A magic carpet
What did the fishermen say to the fish that swam away? "You bass-tard!"
What did one hillbilly say to another? I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife. Best trade I ever made.
Why can't you tell a joke while ice fishing? Because it'll crack you up!.
Guy: Have you ever been fishing before? Girl: Why? Boy: I think we should hook up!