“Hello, Monday! May I ask you a question? Why are you always back so quickly? Don’t you have a hobby?”
“Monday is like a math problem. Add the irritation, subtract the sleep, multiply the problems, divide the happiness.”
“Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life!”
“Candy is nature’s way of making up for Mondays.”
— Rebecca Gober
“I don’t like Sunday nights because you have to wake up to a Monday morning.”
“Monday should be optional.”
“Enjoy every second of Sunday, for when you least expect Monday comes to haunt you.”
“Mondays are mundane, like Tuesdays minus 24 hours.”
— Jarod Kintz
“I hate mornings and Mondays. And working. But other than that I am entirely happy.”
“Monday: nothing a bit of shopping can’t fix.”
“The worst moment today has happened. That was when the alarm went off and I realized it was Monday.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends—but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more-positive partnership.”
— Julio Alexi Genao
“If each day is a “gift,” I’d like to know where I can return the Monday.”
“Dear Monday, my mama doesn’t like you and she likes everyone.”
“Sunday morning my head is bad. But it's worth all the time I had. But I've got to go and get some rest. For Monday is a mess!”
– Dave Bartholomew, Blue Monday
“Never make your favorite song the alarm for Monday morning; you’ll hate it for years.”
“You are in control. Never allow your Monday to be manic.”
— Andrea L’Artiste
“Monday: One of those days when even when your coffee needs a coffee.”
“I really don’t play well with others on a Monday. Can I skip today and just start again with Tuesday?”
“I really need a day in-between Sunday and Monday.”
“May your coffee be strong and your Monday productive.”
“So. Monday. We meet again. We will never be friends — but maybe we can move past our mutual enmity toward a more positive partnership.”
“Monday again? Is it every week now?”
“I'm always in a bad mood on Monday morning. It makes me hate everything for no reason whatsoever.”
“Dear Monday, I want to break up. I’m seeing Tuesday and dreaming about Friday. Sincerely, it’s not me, it’s you.”
“If Monday was a gift, I would happily return it to the person who gave it to me.”
“Monday is almost Tuesday, which is not so far from Wednesday which is neighboring Thursday, and Friday. Enjoy your day!”
“May your coffee be extra strong, and your Monday be extra short.”
“This is the mondayest Monday that ever mondayed.”
“It’s just another manic Monday. I wish it was Sunday. ‘Cause, that’s my fun day. My, I don’t have to run day.”
— Prince Rogers Nelson
“Why is Monday so far from Friday? And why is Friday so close to Monday?”
“Take a deep breath and try to relax. I promise – Monday will be over soon.”
“Set your clocks at the start of the weekend so that you know just how much fun time you get to have. Then smash your clocks so you won't know when Monday starts.”
“Hello and welcome to Monday. Do you take sugar, cream, or Valium in your morning coffee?”
“Maybe Monday doesn’t like you either.”
“Mondays are a lot like getting fat. They make you feel sad, sometimes angry and there is not much scope for liking either fat or Mondays for any reason.”
– Garry Moll
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“At the end of a rainbow, there’s a pot of gold. But when the weekend comes to an end, there’s only a Monday.”
“Due to lack of interest. Monday has been canceled.”
“What is your favorite day of the week, and why it is your favorite day of the week? Mine is Tuesday because that means Monday is gone.”
“I don’t like when I'm all stress-free and peacefully relaxing on the couch and then, out of nowhere, Monday comes along and punches you right off the couch!”
“Monday, you're so jealous of my relationship with Sunday because I am so happy to see you leave!”
“Monday is a sloppy umbrella day, which makes everybody a little blue.”
– George Leedy
“Someone should enact a holiday that honors all people who turn up for work on Mondays.”
“Is it Monday already? I’m almost positive I did not get my entire portion of the weekend.”
“Unfortunately, I did not become a millionaire over the weekend, so I have to return to work on Monday.”
“Monday is great if I can spend it in bed. I’m a man of simple pleasures, really.”
– Arthur Darvill
“SMONDAY: The moment when Sunday stops feeling like a Sunday and the anxiety of Monday kicks in.”
“If Monday were a person, it would be a boring friend who always forces us to do what we don’t want.”
“Roses are red, Mondays are hard. I’m not good at poetry. COFFEE.”