Why does the yogi meditate under the citrus tree?
Because it’s a sub-lime spot.
The least favorite day for an orange is a juice day.
What can a whole orange do that half an orange can never do?
“Look round!”
An organization that citricises its workers cannot get the maximum juice out of them.
“My favorite color is tangerine- isn’t that orange-inal?”
Q: What happens when two oranges collide?
A: They get en-tang-led!
We had made everything for the party and the groom came in, did a quick assessment and didn’t seem amused. “Orange you glad we did this?” we asked him.
During World War 2, sending food to the troops was a challenge. Researchers had to concentrate to figure out how to send orange juice.
What are the longest lasting relationships in the fruit world? Orange-d marriages.
Since her parents wanted to become wealthy fast, they ensured their daughter had an orange-d marriage.
The oranges hadn’t been peeling well for a week when they finally decided to seek medical attention.
I’ve got a great idea for an automatic orange peeling machine I hope it bares fruit.
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle?
“An Orange County Chopper.”
What did the orange say before jumping into the juicer?
“The zest is yet to come!”
Oranges rarely pass driving tests, this is because they keep on peeling out.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
Which language do oranges use to speak to each other? Mandarin.
What would Santa’s name be if he wore orange instead of red?
Fanta Claus.
Did you hear about the orange boxer?
He got beaten to a pulp.
The Paddington bears don’t eat lots of marmalade sandwiches because they are already stuffed.
Apples and oranges had a conversation one day. Guess what the apples were saying the oranges, nothing stupid, apples don’t talk.
Last night I dreamt I was swimming in a sea of oranges. I guess it was just a Fanta-sea!
The next person that asks me for pineapple juice, cranberry juice, lemonade, and a slice of orange all in the same glass is gonna get a “punch.
Why did the lemon like the orange? He’s not from concentrate.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad to see me?
What happened when the orange broke out of prison?
All heck broke juice.
Why did the orange get insurance?
Zest in case.
What do you get when you cross an orange with a parrot? A carrot.
I was throwing oranges at tropical birds. One of them caught one then said: “Toucan play that game”
What do you call a fruit riding a motorcycle? – An Orange County Chopper.
What happens when you rub two oranges together?
You get Pulp Friction.
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
Q: Why did the orange cross the road?
A: Because everyone thought he was a chicken.
Why did the worker get fired from the orange juice factory?
“Lack of concentration.”
What did the orange do the night before the exam?
He put his nose to the “g-rind-stone” and read the entire textbook.
Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill? It ran out of juice.
The orange juice industry is not doing very well.
Tomorrow they will give a special press release.
What did the orange say when a knife pierced it’s peel? Flesh wound.
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
What did mamma orange say to little orange after he spilled his milk? It’s no big peel!
Q: Why can’t oranges be pirates?
A: They don’t get scurvy.
You shouldn’t put orange slices in your beer. Well, maybe once in a Blue Moon.
When I was in grade school, one of my best friends spoke Mandarin. One day, he introduced me to his parents and I told them I don’t speak orange.
The favorite drink for batman is a fruit punch.
The oranges have great eyesight because they always keep their eyes peeled.
The best punishment to give orange kids is getting them canned. This is the only way to prevent them from going bad.
Apple and orange were the only two left that evening. Everyone else had dates.
Why did the orange go out with a prune? He couldn’t find a date.
Tobacco companies have made an orange flavored cigarette?
“They call it “Nico-tang”
The reason orange juice doesn’t slide well on hard wood floors is Because of pulp friction.