Happy Birthday to my best spud….get it? ? Spud…bud? ?
What do you call an everyday potato? A commentater!
Thanks to you, I’m saddled with unnecessary peelings.
People order potatoes a lot because they look a-peeling on the menu.
Why was the sweet potato too shy to ask out the russet potato? Because he was a real spud.
Potato puns are a-peeling.
What is a potato’s favorite baseball team? The New York Yamkees
All potato puns are pomme de terrible.
What kind of potato do you want to take home to your parents? A sweet potato.
What do potatoes become when they smoke weed?
Baked potatoes.
You’re the tater to my tot. I miss you a lot!
I like you a latke!
Why don't potatoes go to parties?
They're scared of the Monster Mash.
What do you get when if you cross a potato and the terminator?
A termitator.
How do you know when a potato is in a bad mood? When they are acting salty
The sweet potato asked the other potato : “How are my eyes? ”
I met a girl that owned three french-fry factories. I was impressed but to her it was just small potatoes.
What do you get when it rains potatoes? Spuddles.
What’s a potatoes favorite horror movie? The Silence of the Yams.
John, you have so much po(tato)tential!
What do you call a potato that smokes weed? A baked potato.
What’s a potato’s favorite TV program? Starch Trek.
Tony, where do I even starch? I yam so happy we’re best spuds!
What did the daddy potato say to his son before his soccer game? I’m rooting for you!
When it started raining, I spotted a potato across the road pretty fast and I wondered what’s up? It wasn’t long before I saw a fork up ahead.
I miss you! I’ll see you tater!
Did you hear about the potato that got its head chopped off? It was decap-potatoed.
What do you call a potato that’s reluctant to jump into boiling water? A hesi-tater.
Why wouldn’t the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
Time fries when you’re having fun!
“How was your day? ” “It was a total disas-tater”
“How are you? ” “Well, I yam fried”
Potatoes have skin. I have skin. Ergo, I am a potato
What do you call a baby potato? Tater tots!
“We are experiencing slight tuber-lence on the flight”
When potato chips don’t sell fast enough, the maker knows it will soon be crunch time.
My love for you sprouts more and more everyday!
Potatoes that are medi-tators maintain calm and peace even when uprooted.
What do you call a person who spends a lot of time sitting and staring at potatoes? A medi-tator.
What do you call a lazy spud? A couch potato.
What do you call a stolen yam? A hot potato.
Why shouldn’t you tell a secret on a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.
I love you a tot!
“I can’t breathe” One potato said to the other. “What happened? ” The other said. The potato replied “I
feel I dropped my nose somewhere”
How does a potato win at Street Fighter? By mashing the kick button.
What do you call a baby potato? Small fry.
A potato gave a gift to his girlfriend.She said, “Aww, why are you so sweet? ”He said, “It’s just the
way I yam.”
“How was your day? ” “It was tater-ible”
What kind of potatoes are in the best shape? Hash browns; they’re totally shredded!