Who are the biggest fans at the theatre? The backstage crew - They're always giving props to the actors.
Our backstage manager is leaving at the end of the year. He has been an outstanding member of our theatre team.
Props to him.
A friend has joined a blonds only theatre group. Fair play to him.
I gave someone directions to a theater today
I guess I am a movie director now.
Why do poltergeists love haunting old theaters?
Because they can't wait to boo the performers.
Don't theater jokes always seem so staged?
Great news! I'm a movie director now! I gave stellar directions to a very lovely family on their way to the theatre.
I tried to come up with a funny theatre joke, but it was all just an act.
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at the drive-in movie theatre?
A: They apparently went to see "Closed For The Winter"
Julius Caesar ordered pizza for the senate at Theatre of Pompey
Casca: How could you not order enough pizza for everyone?
Julius: But there was enough for everybody to have a slice...
Brutus: I ate 2 slices.
Julius: ATE TWO, BRUTE?
Thankfully, not too many thieves are interested in acting on stage. They'd surely steal the show.
Theatre costumes must be handled with care since they're often laced with something.
Everyone was spot on, you really did make a great theatre lighting tech.
I seem to find a way of sneaking chocolate into movie theaters..
.. I always have a few twix up my sleeve.
My buddy was cast in Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs, but he was still angry because he wasn't Happy.
Show your popcorn and coke guy at the movies a little appreciation. After all, he makes a lot of concessions.
You know why theater people say "break a leg" instead of good luck?
Because if you do, you'll end up in a cast!
I wonder why theatres are so sad? They're always dark, moody, and in tiers.
Why the skeleton doesn't go to the theater?
Because he has nobody to go with.
Tried acting in a theatre full of farmers. Got mooed off stage.
This hottie has forever changed the film industry, and it starts with the letter P and ends with 'orn'. Reel your mind back in - we're talking popcorn!
A pig and a horse walk into a movie theater.
The horse didn't feel like buying popcorn so he brought some hay. A theater employee saw him and said. "Are you sneaking outside food into the theater?"
The horse said "nay."
The pig squealed.
I'm coming out of the closet to tell everyone I was just hired as a seamstress for the theatre.
Choreographers are always hard to get in touch with because they are always blocking you.
Opening a new shadow puppet theatre. Business plan says we'll make a fortune, but those are just projected figures.
Couple of friends have decided to put theatre style seats in their house. It will end in tiers.
Theater sound guys aren't always good speakers
Building a good makeup design always starts with a good foundation.
I went to a theater performance done on a bunch of dictionaries the other day...
It was a play on words.
What did the thief steal on the theatre's opening night? The spotlight.
There are two people who both claim to live in the building where Shakespeare wrote Romeo & Juliet. They should put a plaque on both their houses.