What’s big and grey and wears a mask?
The elephantom of the opera.
What did the grape say when the elephant stood on it?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
What animals were last to leave the ark?
The elephants as they had to pack their trunks.
Why did the elephant ask to borrow a suitcase?
Because he only had a little trunk.
What do you call an elephant that’s never clean?
A smelly-phant.
An elephant's opinion carries a lot of weight.
What's the opposite of an elephant?
An eleph-antonym.
Hunting elephants is illegal as ivory well know.
Who do elephants get their Christmas presents from?
Elephanta Claus.
How do elephants bathe?
With their trunks on.
What do you get when you cross two fish with two elephants?
A pair of swimming trunks.
What’s an elephant’s secret talent?
They’re great at multi-tusking.
What do you call an elephant with an aerial on his head?
An elephant-enna.
What do you call an elephant that never washes?
A smelly-phant.
Anything unrelated to elephants is irrelephant.
Elephants will toil all day, and they work for peanuts.
Why did the elephant start the stampede?
Because it wanted to be herd.
I had a job circumcising elephants.
The base salary wasn't great, but the tips were huge.
Looking after more than one elephant at a time requires the ability to multi-tusk.
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Eleph-ino! (Sounds like "Hell if I know!")
What do you call a flying elephant?
A jumbo jet.
Hannibal crossed the Alps because it was safer than crossing the elephants.
What do you call a light-headed elephant?
An ele-faint.
What’s an elephant’s favorite sport?
Squash.
What's grey, beautiful and wears glass slippers?
Cinderella-phant.
What do you call an elephant with rotors?
A Nellie-copter.
Why don’t elephants use computers?
Because they’re afraid of the mouse.